How to Handle a Host Who Isn't Hosting a Restaurant Dinner

Hello Polite One,

I need help with the following scenario!

I have been invited to dinner by my sister-in-law. Mother-in-law and another sister-in-law will also be in attendance. My sister-in-law said to me that I may invite others as well. I find this sticky/difficult, for several reasons.

Several of the parties are not friendly with one another.
Inviting the person(s) says you are paying for dinner; that’s not happening
If guests are limited, others will be offended they were not invited.

Sincerely,

Tarole

Dear Tarole,

Hello there!

You have a perfect out. You could inform your sister-in-law that you don't feel comfortable inviting people to another's affair. Plus, it is even more uncomfortable because guests would have to pay for themselves...this is awkward for you.

If she insists that this isn't a problem for her, just stay firm stating that you really don't feel comfortable with it. Then you could follow up with the fact that this way you will be focused on family members and not your friends.

I hope that will stave off any more comments.

Good luck with the fam! They can be trying.

Most sincerely,

The Polite One

More by The Polite One

Dinner Party Etiquette in Four Situations

Hostess Gift, Buffets, and Dietary Dilemmas

Two Tips for New Relationships

Comments

How to address a divorced woman? Mrs or Ms?

Dear Polite One, Should I use "Mrs." or "Ms." when sending correspondence to a divorced woman? Wondering from Kansas Dear Wondering from Kansas, Both Mrs. and Ms. are proper when addressing a letter to a divorced woman. If you choose to use Mrs., you will use her first name and last name: Mrs. Jane Brown. However, Ms. is the most common title for women these days, because marital status does not define any of us. Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One Too late to send an invitation to Bat Mitzvah? How to reschedule a retirement party? Mother-in-law added names to the guest list!

Do I remove the gloves when eating?

Dear Polite One, I'm attending a very formal ball and dinner is included. I will be wearing long gloves with my long formal gown. Do I remove the gloves when eating? Glove Etiquette Dear Glove Etiquette, It is proper glove etiquette to remove gloves before the meal begins and lay them across your lap. Fold your napkin in half and lay it on top of your gloves. After leaving the table, and before the dance, put them back on. Before dancing, remove them again. Sincerely, The Polite One More From The Polite One What Jewelry to Wear to a Formal Navy Ball? What to wear for a formal ball in New York? Appropriate Dinner and Dancing Charity Event Attire?

How to address an envelope to a married woman who kept her maiden name?

Dear Polite One, With so many females keeping their maiden names after marrying, how I address correspondences to them? Confused Dear Confused, Many times, women keep their maiden names to retain career identity. This is her name no matter what her marital status is. So, if the correspondence is primarily to her, list it like the following. Ms. Jane Brown Mr. John Smith If listed on the same line, add an "and." Ms. Jane Brown and Mr. John Smith If you don't know her husband's name, you could use this example. Ms. Jane Brown and family. If the correspondence is primarily to her husband , list his name first. Mr. John Smith Ms. Jane Brown However, if this is a social correspondence and one is a doctor or holds a title (officer or similar), this person would be listed first. General John Smith and Ms/Mrs. Jane Brown. Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One Correspondence: Dr and Hubby, Grieving Brother-In-...

Got Etiquette Advice?

Search This Blog