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Graduation Party Tips for Four Families

 Graduation party etiquette, gifts, cash, invitations

Prefers Cash

Graduation is a major life event we tend to celebrate, as we should.  However, since this is considered by most to be a gift-giving event, we should follow some etiquette guidance or chance appearing...well, not so well mannered.   

Dear Polite One

My daughter is graduating from High School this year. She does not plan to go to college yet and has secured an assistant management position with her current employer. My question is: she would prefer to have cash in lieu of gifts. Is it appropriate to state that on the reception invitations and if so how would I word it? I would greatly appreciate a prompt reply as I am preparing the invitations to print and need to know.

Thanks so much,

Jean

Dear Jean,

No, it is never appropriate to ask for gifts, especially cash.  Can you imagine receiving an invitation for graduation and reading that you are expected to bring your wallet?  A graduation party is not necessarily considered a gift-giving event.  This is a party to celebrate the accomplishment of graduating and is hosted by the family or the person who has graduated.  To put a focus on gifts would be implying that the only reason you are inviting your guests is to receive gifts for your daughter.  The focus should be on your pride in your daughter's success. 

This is a great teachable moment for your daughter.  This is the perfect time for her to find out that gifts are not what is important.  It is the sharing of time with those we care about. 

Sincerely,

The Polite One

Two Grads; One Party

Dear Polite One

My husband and I were granted Guardianship over a young girl about a year and a half ago. She's only been with us for a year and a half and most of our family and friends have not met her yet.  But she's a wonderful part of our immediate family. This May she graduates high school, along with our oldest son. I have some questions.

  • Do I send their graduation announcements together?  I need to save everywhere I can, and postage can add up.
  • Do I send her announcements to everyone I would send his to?
  • We're having a family party the weekend after graduation. Would it be proper to send the invitation to that party along with the graduation announcement?

Thank you so much.

Simply Southern

Dear Simply Southern,

Usually I suggest separate parties for graduates because each has worked hard to make it to this point.  But, in this case, I think it is appropriate to combine the parties and add her name to every invitation.  So, yes in every case.

Sincerely,

The Polite One

What is the Expected Cash Gift for the Graduate?

Dear Polite One

Can you help me out?  I have not been to a graduation party for several years; my niece is graduating from a catholic high school and has no idea how much to give her in a card.  Her party is at a genuinely nice hall, overlooking the city of Pittsburgh, Three Rivers. 

Help.  

Loren

Dear Loren,

There is no perfect amount.  Some will consider an amount generous, while some consider it lacking.  So, this should be based on your relationship with her and your budget.  Plus, it isn’t all about money.  I realize that many do not know or believe this.  But there are many nice gifts and gestures that are worth much more, such as spending a day together.

In addition, gifts are optional for this type of party.  I know a lot of people consider it mandatory, but it is not. 

Sincerely,

The Polite One

What is Graduation Etiquette?

Dear Polite One

I have a question regarding graduation etiquette.  When a child graduates from 8th grade are you supposed to give them a gift? Monetary or personnel?    Only if there’s a party or anytime? 

Thank you for your help.

Valentine

Dear Valentine,

Not typically and all graduation gifts are optional.

Sincerely,

The Polite One

 

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