Memorial Service Timing and Condolence Card Q and A

When we lose someone near and dear, we grieve, but also have questions. I can’t help with the grieving process, but I can do this...

May I wait 6 Months to Host Memorial Services?

Dear Polite One,

I was just wondering if you know of any rules or guidelines concerning the timing of memorial services. Is there a time limit as to how many days/weeks/months one can wait to have a service for a loved one who's passed? Is it acceptable to wait 6 months for an entire group of family and friends to all be available to come together to collectively honor one who is gone?

Many Questions

Dear Many Questions,

Please accept my sincerest sympathies for your loss.

There is no set timeline and is a personal decision. Sometimes this type of gathering must be hosted weeks after the person has passed. However, typically the memorial is held within the first month. This is not a rule, just an observation.

That said, it is perfectly fine to hold a Celebration of Life months after the funeral.

Most sincerely,

The Polite One

How to Address a Condolence Card to a Wife?

Dear Polite One,

When addressing a condolence card to the wife of the deceased, does use the wife's first name or the deceased husband's first name.

Unsure

Dear Unsure,

Years ago we would refer to the widow as Mrs. John Brown. Today, especially if she is less than 65 years old, she would probably want to be addressed as Mrs. Sally Brown. In most areas, women have dropped their husband’s names.

Most sincerely,

The Polite One

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