Was it wrong to give a gift to her husband?

Dear Polite One,

I'm a bit embarrassed and heartbroken. I gave my mentor and her husband, who is also very active in our group, holiday gifts. His was a bird book because he had mentioned several times that he wanted to learn more. Her gift was similar. They didn't open their gifts in my presence but took them home. The next day, she returned the gift saying that it wasn't appropriate. What did I do wrong?

Confused

Dear Confused,

Well, I'm confused as well. I don't get it! You gave a very considerate gift to her and her husband. Since you gave to both, she couldn't have been surprised about a gift given specifically to her husband. And a bird book is a safe, neutral, and inoffensive gift. I just don't understand what you could have done to deserve this treatment. You did nothing wrong. She acted inappropriately.

Sincerely,

The Polite One

More by The Polite One

Brother agreed to no gifts but gave anyway. What to do?

What is a good college graduation gift for an adult?

Sending gift if not attending graduation?

Comments

What is California Cocktail Attire?

Dear Polite One , What is California cocktail attire? Thank you, Confused Dear Confused , There is no such thing. At times, it feels as if hosts just like to make these things up to confuse their guests. I’m sure that’s not the case. Still... Many hosts try to create a “feeling,” or more appropriately, “set the stage” for an event. So, they will incorporate a well-known attire category with a word that describes that elusive stage. This leads to the confusion we both feel since neither of us can actually see inside their minds. So, I suggest going with slightly laid-back cocktail attire, which typically is the suit for men and the little black dress or its equivalent for women. Perhaps skip the tie and accessories that appear expensive. Additionally, it is appropriate to call the host and ask for clarification. Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One How to Decode ...

3 Most Asked Questions About Listing Doctors on Envelopes

How to List Doctors on Invitation Envelope? Dear Polite One , How does one address an envelope for the two following scenarios? 1) The wife is a physician, but the husband is not. 2) Both the wife and husband are physicians, and she used her maiden name. Lots of Doctors Dear Lots of Doctors, The doctor and husband: Doctor Jane and Mr. John Smith The doctor couple: Doctor Jane Jones Doctor John Smith Most sincerely, The Polite One What is the Proper Salutation for Doctor Couple? Dear Polite One , How do you write the correct salutation when both the husband and wife are doctors? Doctors All-Around Dear Doctors All-Around, If you are close friends, you would use their first names. If this is a formal or business letter, you would use the title doctor for both: Doctors Smith, Doctor Sam Smith, and Doctor Tina Smith, or Doctors Tina and Sam Smith. Most sincerely, The Polite One Don’t Know Husband’s Name and the Wife is ...

What is proper birthday party etiquette?

Guests Contribute to College Fund Dear Polite One , My son turns five next month and I want to inform all guests to contribute to his college fund. He has enough toys and I must consider his future. How do I list this on the invitation? Will an evite work? Wants Donations Dear Wants Donations, I’m sorry but this would be most impolite . Hosts never request cash or any type of monetary contribution for a child’s birthday. If your child is lucky enough to have all his needs met, you could inform guests not to give gifts. This would be best. Good luck! Sincerely, The Polite One Host Wants Guests to Host Dear Polite One, What should I do? My daughter’s best friend is having a birthday party. Her mother has requested all parents attend to help monitor the children while they play at a local miniature golf course. Plus, we are all expected to pay our cost and that of our child. Help! Dear Help! Yikes! This i...

Got Etiquette Advice?

Search This Blog