How to deal with unappreciative gift receivers?

How do I deal with ungrateful children?

Dear Polite One,

May I discontinue giving gifts to those family members who never thank me? I give to the children of my family every year and receive nothing except my credit card bill in return. How do I deal with ungrateful children?

Unthanked in Dallas

Dear Unthanked in Dallas,

Gift giving is always optional. So, yes you may discontinue giving gifts. You might be able to use this as a teachable moment though. Next time (if there is one) if they haven't sent a thank you note, ask the child or parent if the gift was appropriate. Perhaps that will jog the parent's mind that thank you notes are necessary.

Sincerely,

The Polite One

She Never Uses My Gift!

Dear Polite One,

When my sister had her baby girl, I knitted a blanket for her. I was careful to use the colors of the nursery and tried to stay within my sister's style. She did send me a thank you note, but the issue is that she never uses it. It took me an entire week to create the blanket and now I feel like it was a waste of time. Should I ask her if she doesn't like it? I'd rather give it to someone who wants or needs it rather than have it stay in a dark closet unused.

Knitting for nothing

Dear Knitting for Nothing,

I am so sorry this happened, as you meant for this heartfelt, handmade gift to be used and shown off. The unfortunate truth is that when we give a gift it is because we want to and not because we want or expect a reward. However, asking if she did not like the blanket is perfectly fine. Perhaps you could mention that if she doesn't like the blanket, there are charities that could use it.

Sincerely,

The Polite One

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