Which name is listed first on an envelope?

Dear Polite One,

My husband and I disagree on the proper way to address envelopes to couples. I say to list the woman's name first, followed by the man. And if there are children, they are listed in order of age (oldest to youngest).

My husband thinks the man’s name is listed first. Who is correct? I have a dinner out hanging on your answer.

Regards,

Addressing envelopes

Dear Addressing Envelopes,

I hope you have your dinner selection picked out.

A strange old rule not taught anymore, but still followed, state that the man's first name is never separated from his last (Jane and James Smith).

This isn't set in stone, and some find it very silly and stifling. It really is an individual choice on personal correspondence. I would still follow the old rule for correspondence when addressing older people or more formal situations, like weddings.

However, when you are including children, there is still only one rule. Children are listed by age: oldest to youngest. So, you are correct.

Example:

Jane and James Smith

James, Kathy, and Betty (oldest to youngest).

“The Smith Family” works also and is much shorter.

Sincerely,

The Polite One

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